When in Rome...

To get to the studio where I am taking dance lessons I pass through a tunnel that crosses under Ulaanbaatar's central road. The other day as I made my way back from class I was walking close behind an older man dapperly dressed in a gray tweed suit with a cap and spectacles. Distracted by the colorful array of umbrellas set out front of one of the shops in the tunnel, I accidentally trod on the back of his foot. He began looking around in confusion, not only to see who had stepped on his shoe, but more importantly because the custom in Mongolia if you step on someone's foot is to shake their hand. This demonstrates that you had not done it intentionally. Apparently young Mongolians sometimes take advantage of this custom as a way of meeting people at bars: "accidentally" step on someone's foot then offer your hand to him/her to apologize, and introduce yourself at the same time.

Earlier this summer when I first arrived in Mongolia I stepped backwards to allow people off a bus I was waiting to board and accidentally crunched down on a lady's toes behind me. Although I had just that day learned what was proper to do in such a situation, unfortunately I was so flustered by the commotion of boarding the bus that I did not offer my hand until it was too late. This time, though, I was ready! It took me about ten seconds to get my arms into a position where the man could see my hand (during which time he continued looking from side to side confusedly). When he finally saw my proffered hand, though, he clasped it strongly for a brief moment and then we continued on our way with no additional interaction.

That simple gesture of offering my hand resolved the situation neatly, but imagine if I had not known what was proper to do? I keep picturing the man turning his head back and forth and wonder how long he would have searched for a hand, and how unsettled he might have been had I not known to extend him mine. It made me realize once again just how important it is to know the culture and customs of the place you are visiting. The English phrase, "When in Rome, do as the Romans do," nicely sums up this idea. Mongolian also contains a similar saying: "Усыг нь уувал, ёсыг нь даг," which translates to, "If you drink the water, follow the customs." Having drunk a lot of Mongolian water this summer, then, I am glad to follow Mongolian customs.